This Christmas

most people that know me know that i love christmas music. this one has to be in the top 3 songs.

2 Asshole Parkers in 1 Lot!!!!

the second asshole!!!

This is Talent!!!!

to all you people that think lady gaga has talent, listen to this song. this is what we like to call talent. and when i say WE, i mean the people that aren't tone deaf. true talent that doesn't need auto tune to sound halfway decent(and that's giving more credit than deserved). now go run tell that homeboy!!!

First Asshole of the Holiday Season

so i'm parking at Rouse's this evening to get the goods to cook pollo guisado and i notice this asshole parking job. i left him a little note!!

#FreestyleFriday

The mic's a buckshot and lyrics be the shotty
the beef is on and i'm about to catch a body
in a verbal sense and use your name in past tense
out of respect i'll pour some liquor in remem-brance
somebody should've warned you, best ta keep your dis-tance
could've silenced you from jump in mid sen-tence
better yet that would've been your best de-fense
but eddie murphy can't save you in this ins-tance
i give you props and I admire your resil-ience
take five, it's mine, this light I shine is brilliance
more gangsta than Goodfellas or Sicilians....
and rowdier than rioting Brazilians
Take heed the message that I will instill in
your mind, body, soul, and psychological
I'm Dick Dastardly to mics and diabolical

#FreestyleFriday

Never copied Pac, but I'm a straight rider, man
"nicer" than the "friendly" neighborhood Spider-Man
If I'm rockin', bet is gonna be a tighter jam
tighter than the broads I pull from clubs for one-night stands
and tighter than a miser's grip on currency in hand
Damn if you don't ponder, fond of double entendres
real ones back me up, they hold me down, son, I got sponsors
name is legendary, Lancelot and Loch Ness Monsters
Godfather in this piece, and chief, you can't refuse my offer
had I been born in Middle East, my name might be "Mustafa"
coppers fear my crew, you'd think my last name was Sinatra
an all-time great from rhymes I kick, I'm Pele, this is soccer

Bourbon Street?? Really???

so it always rubs me the wrong way when i hear people talk about coming to new orleans and all they really want to see is bourbon st. its even worse when locals think its the cat's ass. like that's all new orleans has to offer. newsflash people…bourbon st. is not that great. in fact, it pretty much sucks. bourbon st. can be replicated in the comfort of you own home by following these steps:

1. go get 3 homeless people. paint one gold, one silver and get the other one to heckle you for money or bet you that they "know where you got your shoes at". you will also need one drunken frat guy to scream wooooooo constantly at the top of his lungs. shit throw in a sloppy drunk girl that's passed out while you're at it.

2. go to your nearest liquor store or convenience store and buy cheap alcohol, but pay 5 times the value of the alcohol. (hint: the 2 for one drinks at the places aren't really 2 for one. hell i can go to the store and buy magnum condoms, but does that make my penis any larger? rhetorical question…it in fact does not!! larger cups and long pouring does not make a stronger drink.  those tooters that they use to give you an extra shot are 3/4 of an oz. a real shot glass is 1 1/2 oz.)

3. go on the internets and download jock jams vols. 1-3. make sure you have these 4 songs though. a.) pour some sugar on me - def leppard b.) jump around - house of pain c.) jump - kriss kross d.) insane in the brain - cypress hill. now put these these cds on repeat.

4. have said homeless people and frat guy piss and puke all over your home for authentic french quarter smell.

ok so what i wrote above might be a little harsh, but that's my opinion. new orleans has tons to offer as far as entertainment is concerned. explore this great city a bit. you will find some great places and have lots of fun.  if you want to stay in the general area of the french quarter, try going to frenchmen st. they have some great places there. the bars are great and the music is even better. if you go to frenchmen st. and you don't have a good time…..like my friend mike "rex" dingier says…."the only taste you have is in your mouth".